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My last short fiction instructor told us not to write about cancer. "It's been done," she said. Well, the hell with that. I learned in the last three weeks that I have stage III breast cancer. Writing, painting, and assorted other arts are how I process stuff, in addition, of course, to long conversations with friends. These conversations have begun in earnest these recent days, but I realized my Facebook page in particular was in danger of becoming a medical-update site. I do not want that. My life is still going to be about more than cancer, as much as that may not seem possible right now. Also, I don't want to alienate friends who are not ready to walk this particular valley with me at this time. For example, one elderly friend who called to cheer me up this week can't even handle the "c-word," and there is no way she will be up for any truly frank discussion of what's about to happen here. So she is advised to keep in touch with me via Facebook. People who are comfortable with the c-word, honest discussion and occasional cursing are welcome to join me here.

Friday, May 6, 2011

First draft, bucket list

Did I get your attention there?  That was mean. I'm sorry.  I am not writing a bucket list because I have learned I am kicking the bucket or anything.  I haven't learned any such thing, and I still hope to not be kicking the bucket any time soon.  But my mental health advisers say that producing a bucket list is a healthy thing to do for anyone, but especially a cancer patient.  The thinking is:  cancer patients can get so "in the moment" on the fighting-cancer front that they forget that there is a future beyond cancer.  Doing a little long-range goal setting is a forward-looking, life-affirming thing. I hope my own personal cancer-fighting project is wrapped up by October or so.  What else do I plan to get up to this year, maybe next year?  Here is my first draft:

First Draft, Bucket List

(in no particular order)

--Write more.  Produce at least one story that is beautiful.
--Dance more.
--Do at least the lowest-level ropes course at the SSFS Adventure Park.  (Seriously, I have acrophobia) peeing myself.
--Learn to fly fish.
--Be in a SSFS Community Play.
--See the Cubs play at Wrigley.
--Take some sort of meaningful action regarding the United Methodists' position on gays, lesbians, bisexuals and transgendered persons.  Our current position is not acceptable.
--Visit:   Greece.  Alaska.  Israel.  And do a walking safari in Kruger Park.
--Climb Kilomanjaro with John.
--Track down certain people and repair relationships.
--Make a career development plan and do it.  Part 1: Decide what I want to be when I  grow up.  Part 2:  Become that thing.
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1 comment:

  1. melMay 8, 2011 at 5:43 PM

    I could not agree more: we often times seem to always be waiting for our lives to begin, when in fact, our lives are happening right now, this minute. Wasting minutes is acceptable, but it should be balanced with living the lives we've always wanted to; Katie, your bucket list draft shows some mighty fine living to be done. I look forward to reading your beautiful story. In some ways, I already am.

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